You
by amanibak
Summary: The end is open to interpretation...
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Hey guys, so I wrote a thing and didn't know what to do with it - so...here it is i guess. Lemme know if you like it and if you think I should continue to upload the remaining chapters. Lots of love x

1

All the symptoms were there. They always had been.

Exaggerated heart rate, dilated pupils, weak knees: she had known for a while.

Every day that she would get the chance to stare into the depth of his eyes was one she couldn't wait to get out of bed for. She'd always been a workaholic, this she also knew. She hadn't ever been able to change that. Not until he had come along. He made her more eager somehow. She didn't know if it was his crazed obsessional theories which seemed to always relate to mob hits, aliens or CIA conspiracies. He just did.

It wasn't love at first sight. She knew that didn't exist. She knew that the man she had first been introduced to wasn't the same one she'd come to hurt and isolate herself from. She new that the man he'd been all those years ago wasn't the same one that had scaled her wall. That solid, high, ever continuing wall. She'd told him about it before. No innuendo intended. She'd told him what was keeping the wall up and he'd stayed but she knew it wasn't fair to him. It never had been. He'd been clawing and scratching and fighting for any bit of her he could find and she still refused to acknowledge the sync that they'd had.


	2. Chapter 2

She didn't think that he'd be around for long. A couple months at most but he had stayed. For four years he had stayed. By her side. Only teasing her. Never pushing her farther than she was wiling to go and only ever protecting her. 'Why was he doing that?' 'Is he protecting me for himself?' 'I don't think I can...'

She didn't know why he kept coming back she hardly ever allowed him into her personal life and when she did, it had been accidental - but as of late things had changed. He'd become actively involved at being by her side whenever her mothers murder began to creep up on her. She knew who had organised her assassination. She knew why. She knew that they would end her if she spoke out of line. She knew that it had been the big guys. She knew she didn't stand a chance.

As the senator strode into the 12th precinct, fates heart quickened and Castle had immediately tried to contain her emotional response. He knew it was coming. She needn't say a word. He knew. They stood in the break room - silent- and watched through the glass panels as Bracken was escorted into interrogation room 3.

'I know you can do this but you know just as well as I do that you don't have to. Ryan and Espo can handle it'

He knew she'd refuse so he kept quiet and understood that her word was final. It always was.

They walked side by side, closer than they usually did and came to behold the room which was inhabited by a man that not only Kate, but also Castle had come to resent. He turned and nodded in confidence to her as he took a step to his left to occupy the so called secret room - 'the room on the opposite side of the mirror room' - but then she did something she had never done before. She almost yelled for him as she did. She reached out and groped his palm in hers.

Although not in any way upset by the action, he was surprised. She had never been the one to initiate touch without absolute necessity. 'There's no way I'm going in there alone'. No more words were needed. He looked into her eyes and let go of her hand as he reached for the door knob and motioned her inside.


	3. Chapter 3

She had done what she had promised herself and her mother that she would not do. She lost her cool. But how could she not? How could she sit idle and coy across from her mother's 'alleged' murderer? He had taken her mother from her. He had taken her love and care and guidance and knowledge and replaced it all with constant breakdowns, harm and disoriented defeat.

Castle couldn't take it, wouldn't take it. Wouldn't let her regret what she was in the wake of executing. As they sat side by side with Bracken smugly seated to their due north, Beckett began raising her voice. Slowly at first then with sudden explosion. She remained seated which was odd, he noted. But he was zealous she had. It would be easier for him to calm her down.

Her voice only continued to escalate until he placed his hand to her thigh. His hands were cold. Like ice to her skin. Like a mini reincarnation. She finished her sentence more hushed than she had started and stared down. Not at his hand on her thigh but stared into herself. She knew what Castle was trying to telepathically tell her. She gave herself time to reflect and regain her self control.

'Detective, I know my rights. You have no solid evidence which links myself or any of my associates to your case. Now, if we're done here..'

He pointed his index finger and motioned between the opposite sides of the metal table as he stood.

They watched him leave and Kate's breath hitched. They both waited in silence until they were subconsciously sure that he had left the precinct.

'I'm going to call it a day.' And she was gone. She'd passed her desk on the way out, acquired her keys, phone and jacket and was in the elevator riding down to the basement garage - aloof.

He wasn't mad that she hadn't thanked him or acknowledged what he had done to help her even though it wasn't much. Not in the slightest. He'd become use to it. She'd show her gratitude in other ways like not making him fill out paperwork after a case had been closed . He was ok with what he had gotten. No response. Nothing. Not a push back not anything to say that she was uncomfortable with his contact and with that he was content.


	4. Chapter 4

She sat still and zombie like on her couch with one knee close to her chest.

11:34 and she hadn't been to sleep. Without being able to stop her whirlwind of thoughts she reflected on the day she (and Castle) had come to conquest.

How did he manage to do that?

How did he calm me without even looking at me?

What. Is going on. (With us)?

Without a second thought she darted to her phone. It wasn't protocol, they didn't usually check in at the end of each day but she did anyway.

It only took a ring and a half for him to boom his voice through her phone speaker.

'Hey'

'Hey'

They sat in silence

'Don't ask' she finally began

'Don't ask what?'

'How I am'

'I didn't ask'

'You weren't asking very loudly'

He chuckled and she sighed with a smile that she was thankful he couldn't see.

'Get any sleep?' He queued

'None' she breathed 'I'm sorry it's late but I just wanted to thank you for...having my back today'

'Always. You know. '

'I know'

He'd created a mantra for them. She hadn't used it yet but he was ever eager to get her to reply with her own 'always'.

'Any great plans for the rest of this night, detective?'

'Oh plenty. I'll probably end up ordering anything that the promotional channel has to offer'

'Kate.'

She always became stiff when he used her first name.

'You know that you can change the channel, right?'

She silently grinned for a second time.

'The remote is just too far away'

She emphasised the last few words

He laughed

'Hmm' he said and the phone line closed.

That was odd. He never just hung up on her. Was he ok? What had happened? Did he fall asleep? Did he have another one of those 'I need this specific food right now' moments are run to the fridge? No seriously, was he ok?

Stop.

She tamed herself.

He's a grown man. He's fine. It's Castle. He's probably at his fridge.

20 minutes had passed and she was still perched in the same position on her couch ready to order the Amazing Banana Split Maker for four easy payments of $19.99.

As she began to dial the numbers displayed on the screen she heard a knock at her door.

What the hell. It's was well past midnight.

She stood and silently opened her cabinet draw to extract her spare pistol and positioned herself to correctly open a door by NYPD standards. Just as she was about to yell the infamous 'NYPD - HANDS UP' she registered who'd been irritably knocking. Who else was it going to be?

He hadn't even flinched at the sight of her pointing a gun to his nose.

'Would you put that thing away. I'm just here to get you your TV remote.'

* * *

**A/N:** Well guys, thats all. Thanks to whoever read this lil' oneshot. I just want to thank S.S, Gee, and The Queen. I love you all, thanks for helping me out with this.

If you guys want to chat I'm at amani_bak on twitter.

Thanks again lovelies x

Much love x


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